Friday 10 October 2014

LIFE: Misconceptions About Expat Life

UK Map

There are a lot of myths and misconceptions about what has an expat entails especially on the long term day to day basis. These misconceptions can often find their way onto the blogsphere or articles which can often lead people to always thinking life is always a certain way. But I don't really like or have time for sugar coating life in general, so here are some of the myths I hear and see about life as, and about being an expat.

We're constantly traveling
And that we have the money to be constantly traveling around the new country we call home. nope. now some people might have the money, but sadly I have a mortgage and bills to pay, we have jobs, I still have to go food shopping, i have obligations and i don't have the money to be jet setting around every state. so no, life as an expat isn't one long holiday. 

It's one big adventure
I've mentioned many times that while yes, living aboard in a new country is pretty awesome what with all the new places to eat and places to go. It comes at a price, there's the guilt, fears as an expat, homesickness, those you leave behind, not fitting in. it's not all fun and games we actually have to live and work.

The grass is always greener
the US has some awesome things going for it - prices tend to be lower, all the places to visit but there's things that I prefer doing and being done in the British way. There are British things I miss, the NHS, attitudes to certain things. people would have you think everything was better, the only way to do things in your new country, it's not often the case. The grass is just another shade of green, that's all.

It's "easy" if you move to a country that speaks your language
to a point, yes I would agree. but local ways of saying things (you'll find some great other regional words here) particular ways, cultural appropriation of certain words and their meaning can be a battle field. let's not mention all the cultural differences that I experience between the UK and the US - the role of politics, religion, the difference in healthcare, women's rights, working. the list is endless. speaking the language is a start, but culture as a whole is a minefield. 

Are you an expat - what misconceptions annoy you? Or if you're not, how to you think us expats live?

26 comments:

  1. As a former expat, I agree with a lot of these things! It's really weird to be back in the States after 3 years in Singapore.... but to be honest, with the exception of the heat, the grass (and world) is really greener in Singapore. I miss it a lot!

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    1. There's good and bad to everywhere I've lived, whether that's been within the UK or here in the US. I tend to miss a certain city in the UK (Newcastle) rather than the country as a whole tbh.

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  2. One thing that really annoys me is the way people seem to not really realize what being an expat entails - which of course, if you haven't been an expat, I guess can be very difficult. It's not everyone, but I often get this feeling that people happily place me in my current context - living in NL - and sort of just forget that I come from my own world, have an actual family and friends who are actual real-life people, and that I wasn't just plopped down in this country through some strange occurrence. It's hard to describe ... do you sort of know what I mean? Am I crazy!? haha maybe ..

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    1. Sometimes it's like you have no back story or that being an expat is all that you are. That's probably why I couldn't be a full expat blogger because there's more to me and my life than just being that. Yes I moved countries, but I have a whole other back story - life, personality, options that relate to me more than just happening to move countries three years ago. Sometimes it's like people only want to hear about the how and why you moved, not about life before hand.

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  3. Haha, I suspect the prices are a lot lower because you live in Detroit. In the SF Bay Area, prices are horrific and without question rival those in London. I'm soooo jealous you guys managed to buy a house already. I'm not sure that will ever be an option for me if I stay here.

    Cat
    http://oddlylovely.com

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    1. I actually live just outside of Detroit in Oakland county - one of the richest counties in Michigan and often ranks as one of the highest in the US depending on which survey you pour over. So yeah, there is a bit of an effect of Detroit being down the road, but prices for a lot of houses around here where way out of our budget. Also some of the houses themselves within Detroit are far from cheap. We live in one of the "poorer" burbs but surrounded but rich ones. It all depends on area - but for us, a hell of a lot cheaper than my British hometown.

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  4. Living in another country and definitely - in my case - living in California can sound really glamorous to some of the people back home, but in real life of course I don't drive around Hollywood every weekend (I actually hate going to LA), we rarely go out because we have full time jobs and I haven't been outside of California since I've moved here... You're right, a lot of people just expect me to take full advantage of this new country and 'discover' the US, as if that's all of a sudden easier when you live away from home. It's not as if I've seen every place in Europe before I moved here :) But most of the time this doesn't annoy me, just sometimes ;)

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    1. Haha you make a good point there - it's not like I was jet setting all around the UK/Europe when I was living there so I really never understand why i'd be doing that here?! I'd love to don't get me wrong, I love exploring my little corner of the US but I can't do that constantly!

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  5. I'm not an expat but found this a really interesting read - thanks for sharing.

    Lizzie's Daily Blog

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  6. What an enlightening view you share with your unique circumstances. I'm not an expat but I am a former resident of Oakland county, MI and agree that it is a very affluent area = high taxes and great shopping! I never realized that living in the UK would be more expensive then here in the US. Glad I've stumbled across your interesting blog through your comments on my daughter's blog. Can't wait to read more!

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    1. Off hand the only thing I can really think of that's cheaper in the UK is healthcare and train travel. Mind you train travel is completely different in the UK compared to the US. Mind you train travel in Michigan is just a no go pretty much. Eating out is probably about the same, bar fast food which is a lot cheaper and lot easier to get your hands on here in the US.

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  7. There are so many misconceptions that I had before I moved abroad. For some reason I just didn't think about how everything would be different. I had no idea what I was in for. Then I got to France and I had this shocking realization that "holy crap, I'm in France, I don't understand anything, and everything is similar to home yet also entirely different at the same time."

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    1. True, although I can't say I pictured life to be a particular way before moving. At least not to the point where it's noteworthy.

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  8. Ahh isn't it just. People think being an expat is easy peasy... it's such a pain in the arse sometimes! I don't think it's easier to do it in the same language, I like to think it would be, just to feel sorry for myself that I get so fuddled here sometimes. But I think even if everything was in English there would be just as much strange shit going on.

    Culture is a big thing. The unwritten rules! They drive me insane!

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    1. I'm pants at languages, me and French didn't get on well at GCSE so I can't imagine the pain of moving countries and having to figure out a new language.

      See those sodding rules get everywhere.

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  9. I think there's something about being a expat and never 100% fitting in. It can be the smallest things like when your workmates start talking about the TV shows they watched when they were little and you just can't participate. But when I do go back to my country of birth it's hard to 100% fit in there as well. People don't always understand why you left and it's very hard to explain the day-to-day of a different lifestyle. These days I just go about life and make the most of everything I can wherever I am.
    Claire xx

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    1. Yeah there's stuff that Joe talks about when it comes to childhood things/experiences/school/shows that i'm like huh?! and he's surprised the amount of things that haven't crossed over. I know if/when I visit the UK i'm not going to fit in there either, moving, experiencing a new country/culture has changed me, i'm not that girl that left.

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  10. I've actually wanted to move to America for around 10 years, can't get it out of my head. I visit maybe once a year but haven't found the angle to actually make the proper move. Looks like I'm going to be into your blog!

    Buckets & Spades

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    1. Good luck - they certainly don't make it easy moving here that's for sure.

      Drop me a message if you ever have any questions!

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  11. I think the trouble is that people's experience of being abroad is when they go on holiday so it becomes hard to entangle that from your head when you think of someone moving abroad. You tend not to immediately think that you basically have to do everything that we do here, but in unfamiliar surroundings!

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    1. You do have a point there - and I will be honest, it felt like a holiday to me for months too.

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  12. I love reading your posts on being an expat, I have always wondered what it would be like to move to another country. And hearing your perspective on what it's like to move to a country that I have lived in my whole life is very interesting!

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  13. As someone who used to be an expat, it was all the misconceptions I faced about my nationality (Canadian) by other expats or locals I would meet. Or all the stupid jokes I would have to tolerate.

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  14. I hear ya! Yep, I may travel a lot right now but that's about to change a little as we attempt to save for a house. Everyone thinks all I do is sit by the pool all day in the sunshine...erm nope. I have work to do, a house to sort out, food shopping to do. It's not all smiles and happiness everyday, I miss my friends and family so much and have bad days when there are tears but I guess what is something you just have to deal with. I chose to be an expat and I love it but there are areas that are pretty pants - it's not all sunshine, smiles and happiness. X

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  15. All of the above! Especially the moving to another english country thing. It can be almost as bad at times (many many times). Glad it is not just me! That first photo is so poignant and well chosen

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