I've been meaning to post this for a while but I've always been interested in hear other couples experiences of being in an undertaking long distance relationships after being in one myself. Jo, who blogs over at
Life in a Wendy House did a fabulous write up of her own experiences which I'm sharing with you today and I'm sure it will be of particular interest to those of you who are, or are about to undertake a university based LDR.
Hi, I’m Jo and I’m in a long distance relationship.
They say admitting you have a problem is the first step to solving it, but this isn’t a problem.
When my dad asked if me and my boyfriend, of then two years, were going to stay together when I moved down South for Uni and he studied at home, my response was “Of course, why wouldn’t we?”. He raised his eyebrows, obviously expecting us to split up and forget one another in our fresher’s haze, but it didn’t happen. We’re now 2 years into our LDR and still together. Why? Because we make it work despite what everybody else’s preconceptions are.
There are nearly 200 miles between us, it’s a 3 and a half hour train journey, and because we both have university commitments I see him normally around once every ten week term. I’m not going to say it’s a walk in the park, because there are difficult times. I get annoyed when I want to ring him but he’s busy, he gets annoyed when I go out and forget to text him when I get home, but they’re problems that are easily solvable. In fact, I think it’s a lot less difficult to have an argument when your miles apart from each other because you instantly just want to forget about it and make up rather than continue a long, pointless argument via phone or text.
It’s all about making time for one another and making sure that the time you do manage to spend together is the very best it can be. After those ten weeks have passed I know I’ll have a month at home when I can spend time with him and do the things we both miss when we’re apart, and that’s what I try and remember when I’m crying over how much I want to go home and how much I need a hug.
We make the effort to talk every day. We text daily, updating each other on the little things in life and speak on the phone or skype occasionally when we have more time to spare, but just because we’re not in contact 24/7 or seeing each other every day doesn’t mean our relationship is a failure, far from it. I honestly believe that moving away from each other has improved us as a couple; the space an LDR offers gives you a chance to reflect on all the good and bad within your relationship and work with that knowledge to improve your relationship and yourself when you’re apart, so that when you are together it’s almost perfection.
I have one more year apart from him and then who knows what will happen. I can’t predict the future but what I do hope is that we’ll still be together even then. After almost 5 years together it’s difficult to see your relationship going in any other direction than together and I’d really like to have the happy ending that many others achieve despite the miles.
So, I’m Jo. And I’m proof that a long distance relationship can work.
If you're in a long distance relationship and want to share your story, get in touch!